Last Days

These are my days.
I’ve lived well. I’ve lived badly.
Now I just live, and write.
[Work in progress...]

Dinner For Two

This eighty year old couple were celebrating their 60th anniversary and the wife says to her husband, ” Honey lets get stark naked and sit at the dinning table and eat our dinner!”
As they sat at the dinning table the wife says, “Honey I am beginning to get very hot and very aroused!”
The husband says, [...]

You

It had been troubling me all day but I said nothing. Henry and I had been hiking in the Scottish Munroes for three days, camping overnight next to charming little brooks and living off frugal but delicious rations. We’d only been married just under a year and things had not been going very well, as [...]

Love

She lay in the hospital bed, a little thing in a sea of white, golden hair bedazzling her plain pillow, and I could see the concern in her eyes; it was not surprising as this was her first time in hospital.
She turned to me, “Daddy, will I make Timmy better?”
I smiled, “Yes, love, your bone [...]

Define Necessity

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Anger

in Blog by MV on January 30th, 2010

angry
Anger is such a tame word to describe a state of being that really needs a powerful word to evoke images of toxic fuming, thunderous choleric rantings, dog kickings, effusive profanity and a whole lot of snarling.

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The benefits of good healthy living

in Funny by MV on January 30th, 2010

old

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Snowed In

in Six Sentence by MV on January 11th, 2010

I watched as the snow drifted heavily against the window, and knew that soon we would be snowed in for the winter. It happened every year and we were well stocked with food in preparation. Claire loved the snow, but I think what she liked most about winter was the enforced containment of her husband, who during the warmer months would while the hours away doing manly things like fixing the lawn mower, returning at the end of the day to grunt monosyllabically over supper. However, now there were no distractions and he was hers, I was hers, all hers; hours of quality time and conversation.

She sat down at the table and placed the box in front of me, smiling gleefully, “Scrabble?”

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Suicide

in Six Sentence by MV on January 11th, 2010

I wanted to end my life, but could not be arsed. So I decided to sit down in the middle of the road and wait for death. It was a Sunday morning so I had to wait a long time until someone drove by, but swerved to avoid me, bastard. I asked the nice policeman who eventually came and took me away if he would shoot me but he just drove faster. Now, with these white straps I couldn’t kill myself even if I could be arsed.

Oh, well.

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Agnostic

in Six Sentence by MV on January 11th, 2010

Henry came to faith as an Agnostic at the age of 12 when he discovered that he had been lied to by his parents, and this not for the first time. Ok, he’d forgiven them the tooth fairy story – after all it was a little far fetched: who’d want old teeth anyway – but this was too much, and that on the day before Christmas.

Henry reckoned that if he couldn’t trust his parents to tell him the truth, then nothing could be trusted. And if nothing could be trusted then nothing could be known.

He slept soundly, convinced that if nothing, at least his logic was certain.

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My first kiss

in Six Sentence by MV on January 11th, 2010

I didn’t know much about my first kiss because I was unconscious at the time. You see I had been daydreaming again when a bus knocked me over. I lay sprawled on the floor, blood seeping from my head. A crowd soon gathered, gawping at me silently, until a large man pushed his way through and knelt down. “I’m a doctor,” he said as he leaned over me, roughly fondling my young breasts as he gave me the kiss of life.

He’d been eating onions – I can still taste them today.

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Born in the USA

in Six Sentence by MV on January 11th, 2010

He was born on the 79th floor of a rather bland apartment block. It was a home birth because the lift was broken and the midwife said there was no fucking way she was walking up all those stairs. As for his mother, well she had similar thoughts and sat on the sofa watching a rerun of Friends while he was born. His father was drunk again and didn’t really notice his arrival apart from when he tripped over the umbilical cord to take a piss.

Henry waited until he could walk and then jumped out of the window.

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Home

in Six Sentence by MV on January 11th, 2010

He is standing in the snow, shivering, presumably to death, huddling against the biting wind. I can see him looking at me through the window, longing to come in, but this is my house, my hard-earned warmth, and he can bloody well freeze his sorry arse off for all I care.

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Moment

in Six Sentence by MV on January 11th, 2010

She must have been approaching sixty, but had made an effort, hiding a face that sagged wearily under stylish, bleached hair and heavy make-up. He however was much younger, and by their body language I reckoned he was a son rather than a lover. She talked most of the time, as women are want to, while he nodded politely, now and then stifling a yawn while he watched the landscape rush by on it’s way to somewhere important. She paused, noticing he wasn’t listening, and sighed sadly.

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Little Red Bag

in Six Sentence by MV on January 11th, 2010

The little red bag stood alone on the platform. I watched as passers by gave it a wide birth and security were called to investigate. What was the story behind this little bag? A terrorist seeking justice, a forgetful owner, or perhaps she had simply left behind a family of little red bags to make a life of her own? I felt for the little thing as two burly guards manhandled it into a trolley and wheeled it to a dark storeroom where it would forever remain lost property.

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